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翻译赏析:张培基英译散文赏析之《哭》

yun 于2016-12-26发布 l 已有人浏览
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吴冠中(1919—2010),江苏宜兴人,现代有名画家、油画家、美术教导家。

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哭   On the Verge of Tears
吴冠中   Wu Guanzhong

那年,我坐夜车去朝拜圣地——到茂陵仰望霍去病墓前的雕刻。
Years ago ,I went by night train to Mao Ling ,a sacred place in Shaanxi Province,to pay homage to the sculptures standing before Huo Qubing's tomb.

要点:
1,标题固然是《哭》但根据文章内容,标题更确切的意思应为“将近流泪”,或“简直流泪”,是以译为On the Verge of Tears
2,“那年”即“有一年”或“几年前”,译为that year会形成读者困扰,由于that 平日指前面提到过的事物,现译Years ago
综述:
标题标翻译看似简单,实际上是建立在关于全文的懂得上。


夜车到了终点站,霍去病墓还老远。在那满天星斗的西北草原上,我时而顺着大年夜车道,时而踏着羊肠小径往前赶路,及至霍去病坟场,天色才开端曙明。邻近没有行 人,我迫在眉睫的扑向墓前那几座庞然巨物的巨大年夜雕刻作品。我非常冲动,它们永久是活着的,并一向是我精力上的支柱。当我在异国遭到歧视的时辰,当世界上其 他国度的出色艺术品令我敬佩的时辰,我自馁的时辰,苦楚的时辰……这几座气概澎湃的永久的石头雕刻便总会涌如今我的眼前。
As it was a long way from the terminal station to Huo's tomb,I had to hurry on with my journey on foot under the starry sky of Northwest China,sometimes on along a broad road,sometimes on a narrow footpath.The day was just dawning when I arrived at Huo's tomb.Not a pedestrian in sight.I lost no time in presenting myself before the majestic carved works of great magnitude before the tomb ,I was beside myself with agitation .The immortal art treasures will be my permanent spiritual prop.Whenever I am discriminated against in a foreign country ,whenever I stand in awe before a foreign outstanding work of art ,whenever I am disheartened,whenever I suffer agony … these imperishable stone carvings of amazing grandeur will inevitably appear in my minds eye.

要点:
1,“夜车到了终点站,霍去病墓还老远。”译为As it was a long way from the terminal station to Huo's tomb,以as串句简洁流畅,假设用when the night train arrived at its terminal station, Huo’s tomb still a long way off…则不如第一种译法通畅
2,“我…往前赶路”译为I had to hurry on with my journey,to hurry on with 意为“匆忙做某事”如:He promised to hurry on with the report and send it to us today.  (他准予赶忙写好申报,明天就给我们送来.)
3,“邻近没有行人”译为Not a pedestrian in sight,个中省略了was,不知道有若干童鞋想译成there be……
4,“我迫在眉睫地扑向…”译为I lost no time in presenting myself before… 个中“迫在眉睫”还可译为hurriedly ,“扑向”即“奔向”,还可译为came up to…
5,“它们永久是活着的,并一向是我精力上的支柱”译为The immortal art treasures will be my permanent spiritual prop,个中art treasure 是译者后加的,属于增加词,为的是满足造句的须要
综述:
本段在简化句子构造和增长流畅性上有很多出彩的表达,比如Not a pedestrian in sight…和借用增译词来引导句子,值得我们自创。


我久久彷徨于霍墓雕刻间,远看,完美无缺;近看,耐人寻味,在粗暴的斧凿中行走着弯曲的线。斯是顽石,却生机勃勃,全球的艺术家到此不克不及不寂然起敬!“我们的先人比你强的多!”我或许是持续了阿Q精力成功的一面吧,但有了如许矗立活着界艺术史上的先人爷爷,确切得天独厚。这总是值得欣喜的!
I loitered for quite a long while among the sculptures, which were an integrated mass when viewed from afar and very intriguing when scrutinized lose by. Traceable among the rough marks of hatchet and chisel were delicate lines zigzagging .Insensate as they were, the carved stones were brimming with life and vigor, Artists from all over the world cannot help feeling awed when they visit this place."Our forefathers did much better than you!" I declared  ,maybe affected by Ah Q's philosphy of "spiritual victory". We are indeed very lucky to have our forefathers standing tall and upright in the world history of art. This is certainly a matter for rejoicing.

要点:
1,“在粗暴的斧凿中行走着弯曲的线”即“弯曲的线条行走于粗暴的斧凿陈迹中” 译为Traceable among the rough marks of hatchet and chisel were delicate lines zigzagging .译者采取倒装句,加倍凹陷“线条”的主语地位
2,“都不克不及不”译为“都禁不住要…”译为can not help doing
3,“我或许是持续了阿Q精力成功的一面吧”即“我或许是受了阿Q‘精力成功法’的影响”译为maybe affected by Ah Q's philosphy of "spiritual victory". philosophy作“人生哲学”“不雅点”解,本国读者能够不睬解甚么是“阿Q精力”此处要稍微解释一下
综述:
四字词值得积聚。


1989年我重返巴黎,感慨万千。前往后,我怀着一种极端复杂的心境又一次去老了西安,再一次仰望霍墓雕刻。在霍去病墓前,在秦俑坑前,在碑林博物馆的汉唐石雕前,我只想嚎啕痛哭。老伴跟随我,还有那么多不雅众,我不敢哭。哭甚么?哭它太巨大年夜了,哭老鹰的后代不会变成麻雀吧?
In 1989,While revisiting Paris ,I felt all sorts of emotion surging up within me, Back in China, when I paid another visited to Xi'an and the sculptures before Huo's tomb,I was seized with mixed feelings, I just felt like crying with abandon as I stand once more before Huo's tomb, before the Chin Dynasty terra cotta warriors and horses and before the Han Tang Upright stone tablets bearing ancient inscriptions .But I refrained from tears because I was then accompanied by my wife and surrounded by numerous spectators. Why did I feel like having a good cry?Because my motherland is so great and because of my fears about the descendants of the eagles turning out to be sparrows.

要点:
1,“我只想嚎啕痛哭”译为I just felt like crying with abandon,个中with abandon作“听凭”“尽情”解,如:People were shouting and cheering with abandon.  意即”人们兴趣勃勃,尽情喝彩.”前面的good  cry也是“痛哭一场”的意思
2,“哭老鹰的后代不会变成麻雀吧”意即“由于担心老鹰的后代会变成麻雀而哭”译为because of my fears about the descendants of the eagles turning out to be sparrows.个中my fears about 和I am worried that 都是根据意思的增益的词,为了文章的顺畅表达
综述:
本段乃至全文都有很多增益的部分,它们在包管文章流畅和精确传达原文意思中的感化功弗成没,值得留意。

【文章来源:沪江英语】

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